I want to talk to you about the “real sexy.”

Most of us hold an internal image of what “sexy” is supposed to look like.  It is an image that is put upon us from the media, our society, our upbringing.  There is some sort of “pass go” idea or “living up” to quality about sexy.

In truth, being sexy is being yourself.  There is nothing more sexy than you standing in who you are, moving toward your desires with love.

Part of the problem is that the search to be sexy causes us to be disembodied. If you were to really and fully step into your body during lovemaking, what would that look like?

When I am in my body, it knows what to do.  And is is not always “sexy.” Sometimes my body needs to make large movements, shake, or jump.  Sometimes I need to cry or yell!

We hold back our sexual energy constantly for fear of not fitting in.  Just think of being a little kid sitting in a desk at school.  Remember being told not to wiggle or fidget? Society would have us constantly keep our natural sounds and movements in check.  But sexy is actually whatever makes you feel good!! 

Rather than change the world all at once, how about bringing the wiggles and fidgets back into life?   Being weird, or “unsexy” is really just your body running energy.  Wiggle.  Fidget.  Move. Sound. Express. Be yourself. Sexual energy is joyful.  It is purposeful.  It is a pathway to wellness and fulfillment.  And it feels good to be around this energy when it is being owned and celebrated.

Please wiggle and fidget as much as you like!  It’s a good start.