Did you know that bonding chemicals are actually released from eye gazing? We are neurologically wired to respond to another human being when we look into their eyes.
I remember doing sustained eye gazing with my partner at a tantra workshop for the first time a couples of years ago. The teacher had to come around and actually tell us to stop talking. Our relationship had become one of thinking. The urge to talk was a knee jerk reaction. It was comfortable. Just pure eye gazing felt very vulnerable.
But eye gazing has become something we both cherish now as a way to assess how connected we are, to reconnect, and to return to being embodied together.
Try eye gazing at home. Find a time when you can sit and be relaxed. Don’t be surprised if some resistance comes up. You will connect to your feelings through silent eye gazing. And some of these feelings may have been buried for a while.
The good thing about eye contact is you cannot hide. You can’t space out and go out of your body either. Making eye contact is a way of showing that you are present – you are in your body. If it’s uncomfortable at first, take your partner in sips. Open and close your eyes with each other. Keep coming back to connection and bonding. Afterward debrief your experience and any emotions that may have arisen.