What is beauty? I’m wanted to share with you an exercise for self-exploration that you can try at home on your own when you feel safe and when you have privacy. It’s one of those exercises where you look at yourself in the mirror and I’m actually adapting it from an eye gazing exercise that I teach to couples. So instead of gazing into the eyes of your partner, you gaze into your own eyes.
There are three levels to it:
- What do you see when you gaze into the eyes of this person? This is the first surface level part of our brain that has judgements, associations, comparisons and ideals of what is good or right or beautiful or wanted.
- What do you see at the heart of this person? What kind of heart are you seeing? What kind of heart does this person have? This is starting to sink down to a level of seeing what’s behind all the images and even behind the layers of ways that we show up for other people.
- What do you see in terms of the spirit of this person? What is the core essence of this person? what is the stuff that they’re made of? What do they stand for? What do they believe in? Who are they, not only as a human being, but as an energy, as an essence? What is their spirit?
We often look at ourselves the way we look at others, just from that surface level and we compare ourselves to others. There are all kinds of judgements at the ready because there’s a lot of programming around how are supposed to look and what kind of shape and what kind of size, how we should do our hair, etc. When we look in the mirror, we have the comparison of advertising and all that imagery around us from digital and print and the Internet.
Watch my experience of doing this exercise in the video below.
This exercise seems simple and innocuous, but it actually be very powerful and emotional. There can be a lot pent-up in seeing ourselves: our idea of our self-worth based on our image. So, if you want to try it on your own at home, really take the time and sit and breathe. Look deeply into your eyes and just let whatever comes up be there. Whether it’s yours or whether it’s been given to you, once you make space for it and just accept it and listen to it, then you can make a choice to change your thinking and seeing. Then you can decide how you want to feel moving forward and what you want to say is true beauty! You get to decide!